A definite Baldwin.

Yo,

Losing your grip on what's real and what is not real is, perhaps, the most fundamental element of insanity. I was giving it some thought and, outside of liking The Postman, that truly might be the pillar upon which losing your grip is based. I can comment on this specifically in today's post for the following reason: Living alone will freak you the fuck out.

"But, Andrew, aren't you a sissy?" Well put reader, and the answer is unequivocally, yes I am a sissy. However, this extends far beyond sheer girlishness. The answer to this question I'm afraid doth lie in wait for anyone of you. Yes even you, whom nothing rattles, there is the possibility that you will, one day, live by yourself. The following are observations about living (terrifyingly) alone:

1.) A simple realization, no one will ever see anything. -Ex. Your hand washing silverware...there are some spots on it that are tough to get off. You try to get them off. This completely sane and rational exercise is interrupted by the realization that, once clean, who cares if there are spots on them? Why work hard at getting them off? NO ONE WILL EVER SEE THEM. This ethos is quite simply put, the beginning of the end. Laundry, cleanliness, hesitancy to read Ann Rice, all this slowly eeps away while you wallow in the deep dank pit of self engorgement. Want that extra slice of pizza? Have it! Don't want to throw the box away? Who would!

It's JUST YOU.

2.) Often times you can scrape the crumbs off you in a timely enough fashion to have a discernible thought. Often times this thought might be something like. "What was that noise?" (FYI-The world at large is full of noises. A more accurate distillation of the world there may not be than "Shit is moving and making sounds.") However, you did not know this, but the presence of others has buoyed your "insane," reflex. When you are alone on the other hand....paranoia is allowed to run free and unchecked. Furthermore, this debilitating prognosis is degenerative. The longer one stays alone the greater the risk of turning a muffled thud sound into someone sharpening an ax blade on the human skull of a very (formally) pretty blond haired woman who, amongst other things, was on her way to warn you that her killer was also after you on his way to killing all four of the prophets who, when combined, could come together and summon the sun go Ra in order that he might deflect the eventual coming of the dark lord who would throw this planet and its people back into shackles of servitude they served in before they rebelled successfully against their reptilian overlords early in this planets history.

Or something like that.




There are of course other things that come as a by-product of living alone. The rest of the list is, and will hopefully remain, comfortably out of your understanding.

*******


That all being said, it would seem as if the housing market has finally brought to bare what anyone, who is not a CEO could have told you two years ago. This recovery has been a hollow one. Predicated on shaky lending practices and an American desire to "keep on spending no matter if your children still need school clothes and you have a medical problem." This slash of the fed rate will mark an unprecedented era of "Andrew was correct," the likes of which haven't been seen since I totally figured out Alicia Silverstone was in love with Josh before she did.

*******

That's all for now, thanks for checking in and to wet your whistle here's this golden piece of cinema. This is both a testament to my effort to keep the links relevant and also to the complete crapification of youtube.com...R.I.P.


Cheers,

A.J.S.