Sit down, shut up and get out a sucker.

Hey there,
Wow, there is nothing really like being sick. Pushed to the brink of sanity it is only here where a person wonders if it actually all is worth it. This is the one time that a person can be completely narcissistic. Your only concern is you. Liberating as this may be there are those who don't see it that way. Namely your roommates. Although as far as Im concerned I don't understand why an exfoliating rub down is that out of common practice. I mean I'm sick, and I need some help. Obviously my pours aren't going to exfoliate themselves.

That all being said, I've always been a mind over matter sickness adherent. For better or for worse i try and out think the disease. After all if existence is perception, perhaps I can block out hemorrhoids goes the ethos. However, this current bout is testing the ardent nature of the philosophy. Rarely have I been this shook. It's difficult taking bedrock and making it bedpan. More difficult still to swallow (sorry for the gross-out) the bed-pan, but it seems every once in a while your personal foundations shift and it appears that I may be dangerously close to losing some philosophic footing. I guess i really should have bought those mental hiking boots and to think, before now i thought QVC was a scam...

To me being sick always underscores pretty deep thought, I mean what else have you to do? In fact , its almost like old hat at this point. I lay there, prostrate, wearing lipstick, wondering what I did to deserve the headache and the only thought that seems to run through up there is "what did I think about last time?" An interesting point Andrew. What did you think about last time? Was it something of note?, was it something tangible? Although the answer to both those questions is probably not, it still merits some consideration. I like to define intelligence as the capacity for abstract though, therefore, it's difficult for me to render one person stupid and one person smart seeing as how the abstraction for two people are inherently different. In fact from a third party perspective (which is how much SHOULD be analyzed it seems to me ) many things have been accomplished by people all across the intelligence spectrum not rendering any of the acheivements more important than any other one. In fact one might go as far to say as the propensity for simplistic abstract thought might produce a more benignly beneficial product. Although the pet rock took no stroke of genius it has less potential for evil than does cold fusion.

Befuddled logic yes, but it believe it was Yoda who said "try? think?....do or do not there is no try." Action is not a consequence of intelligence. Lobbying for greater social equity or more toilet paper in the dorm bathrooms requires no higher logic. Only action, and in some cases, higher logic would be bad. Emphasize the action and not the thought, the Henry David and not the not the Ralph Waldo. I mean Yoda lifted a fucking X-Wing out of the mud. Deal 'wit dat.

Back to being sick though, the first thing to go is your tolerance of anything other than the easiest possible way to do anything. Being as how you have minimal energy to expend in the first place to see or be made to, expend energy in a less than efficient manner can make one furious. "Just freaking pick a channel and stick with it," one might be heard to say.
Hostility is not a suit that I particularly wear well and knowing that I try and reconcile my noticeably shorter fuse with the fact that I am sick. No one really cares if you are or not, but you are and you must cope. Personal tests,outside of the timed variety, can prove to be difficult.

Well that about raps it up for me. As for advice for the day I guess recommending washing your hands frequently to avoid getting sick would be a bit preachy, but then you probably read Dear Abbie so your used to it. Wash those hands.

Sometimes snake eyes can bring down the house.

Hey there,
A pleasant Monday evening to you all. I'm sure that you've been well as it seems most have been. I,personally, can't seem to shake the feeling today that although I am completely certain that I don't have anything that I should (we'll overlook the fact that "should" could easily be defined as serving at a soup kitchen etc.) be doing something else. Which is not an altogether pleasant feeling. I'm sure many of you have felt things similar to these lingering paranoia pangs but believe you me this is the worst case I have suffered in this many years.Metaphorcal red creeping into the corners of my eyes. It's almost making the slow transition into physical symptom manifestation, making my stomach uneasy and my feet itch. I suppose I could explore the reasons why this could be going on....

1.) Perhaps I completed a task not to its entirety, and subsequently am feeling a lack of accomplishment from my lackluster performance (sorry Kerry maybe next year). However, although I will grant you that the possibility of me flubbing something up is distinctly large, I hardly think that anything I participate in could be this detrimental. At least to me. I try very hard and am quite successful at limiting the amount of activities I involve myself in that could potentially bring harm on my house. After all, I have the Simmons crest to defend.

2.) I realized that time is probably better spent doing something other than watching step by step re-runs while writing in some blog. Although these are both noble endeavors there are those that claim (and I'm not giving value to either sentiment) that time allocation is important to task management. That being said have you seen the episode where Al becomes a women and J.T. realizes it? I thought so.

3.) Comic books don't correlate with real life to the degree to which I was lead to believe. Albeit they serve as huge metaphors and aid greatly in the art of attracting women. It would seem as if both chicks and society don't dig wearing a cape as much as I thought they would. Tragic.

4.) I actually am forgetting to do something. Very unlikely.
(ed note: it was the authors great great grandfather whom after talking a much winded Llyod George into getting some Arby's on the way to sign the Treaty of Versailles, was heard to say upon being informed that Mr. George was now late to the meeting, was heard to say "Oh crap."

Although I recognize that there are many other candidates for reasons which I would being feeling these trepidations I believe those to be the leaders. Too bad that partying 'till five a.m in Damascus was last weeks excuse. I should pull it together.

To you the reader, I bid you adieu, I wish I could spend more time with you but alas, there is work to be done, and, ironically enough it's to be spent honing my writing skills via a Junior Comp class. With any luck, next time I rap at you it will be from the guided pen of a junior collegiate level writer. But I wouldn't get your hopes up.

So Andrew walks into a bar...

Dear Reader,
Many a post ago I found myself wondering what exactly the purpose of this life was. Although I had flirted with many "religions," in order that I might find some solvency, I lacked direction. Little did I know that these escapades into self were merely a harbinger of the real reason I was put onto the planet.
You see rapping is not an easy game, in fact often I have heard brutal tales of slaying, and raping laced with promises of vast amounts of wealth entwined in my peers lyrics. However, these trials and tribulations cannot stop that which is pre-ordained and my inevitable rise to rap superstardom is, at this point, pseudo-unavoidable. I believe I exude all characteristic that I have observed in successful hip hop groups. A message, a swagger, a large penis, self-inflated thoughts about ones own penis and a dope basketball game (see:freakin brothers every way like MJ) that being said this rise will not be easy. As I have learned, a rise to fame is littered with the carcasses of those less fortunate. Wangsters, who presumably thought it was nothing but drug slinging and partying all the way to No Limit solidarity. This is where my line of demarcation sticks out and separates the wannabes from the always will be.
Mine is an effortless flow, timeless, a greenslevian compositional strucure with both pantameter and rhythm that makes women, as well as men, both swoon and turn thier thoughts to love and glocks. Couple that with my innate understanding of the mean streets of various places and the fact the my street cred rise five fold daily, then I think your probably onto what so many already know. My destiny is inevitable.

I truly don't know where that came from, and I suppose I don't have to explain it to you. My weekend, and the reason for my vaca from the blogging world, was filled with all things Kentucky. A greater state I am not yet convinced exists. Normally when one visits an area (or at least I)constantly am reminded that I am indeed a visitor to the place. Lest this reminder be via a lack/shock/ of understanding at local culture and practices or by an actual citizen poignantly reminding you that here is certainly not your "here." That being said though Kentucky, to my experience , shatters all those previously held stereotypes of travel. The people and citizenry are genuine to a fault making to both easy to discern local culture and to adapt to it, and adapt I did. The entire state allows and encourages things which, unto this point in my life, had been held largely taboo (i.e. shooting guns at things) this however is readily accepted practice. The cold steel and warm blood pumping through you are the only things that you feel when holding firearms (I presume, as I never really held one.)
The overall disposition of the people is what sets it apart. Truly allowing you to feel like a welcomes participant in life, there is no trying to find the hidden underbelly of the culture and nightlife. There is no invasion of cult beliefs and social circles digging harder and harder to find something real. No, in these ale houses both the shalacked wood and friendly drunks are your friend. Making one feel delightfully included and shamed at his or her own lack of openness and social graces.

Being back is a bit of a bummer though, to return to cold weather is always the worst way to return. Wind as invisible bullets makes being a pedestrian a combat activity and unluckily I am ill-equipped to deal with the hostile Charlie. We will see how I cope. Hopefully there is less crying than the last time I was in a combat zone (Hallmark Store). With that horrific excuse for attempted humor, reader, I leave you. The rest of my night must be lived and although it might be bland there's going to be a lot of it, and what isn't made better by vast quantities? Except Ricki Lake.

BE REAL.

On my street, these are the fables.

Hello,
The weathers pretty good and so it seems like everyone else is in relation to it. Which is a pleasant change from the horrific torture school that seemed to be these last couple of day. I don't know exactly what all the deal was but it seemed like the colder it got subsequently people got angrier. Not that I blame them I suppose there is a lot to be angry about. My main qualm with this kind of weather is really the extra preparations it takes to begin your day. I would venture that (in reality I guess I hadn't realized it until I wrote that sentence) I'm a minimalist when it comes to preparation and related taskes for better or for worse. Head first diving is my swimming event and as it goes I'm relatively successful with it. Where the fuck does weather get off trying to encroach on that? The sanctity of determining my own level of involvement is the one thing that I have left in this slowly decaying universe and the indifferent hand a fickle natural god is trying to pry it from my grasp. Seeing as how I have no control over this I find myself trying to pack this extra time into exactly the same amount of prep time that I would allocate for a normal day. Which, other than inherently problematic, is also not very successful despite my best efforts. Trying to coat,hat and glove up in the time that it normally takes one to put thier shoes on (did I mention that I also have TO put shoes on?) can invariably bring some detriment to ones ability to effectively be on time places. I'm not changing though, why should I? The weather is the one who sucks.
That being said everything is flowing quite nicely as of late wouldn't you say? Although I am aware that there is a small faction of you reading that aren't enrolled at some university I will echo my peers and collectively exhale at mid-terms rapping to thier conclusion and duck as to not get hit with the wind current that so often takes place when an entire university decides to breath. I only duck during the briefest first moment though, because after the initial push thier is nothing nicer than a campus relaxed. I believe it was Euripides whom said " Slay not thy beast, lest the campus itself be relaxed." He was spitting truth. It's fun to walk through that door held open out of sincerity as opposed to forced social mores. Although, nothing detracts from the fun of exploiting forced social mores. Ever keep sneezing just to receive the bless yous?
Can there be no greater discontent than that which seems to be building for this mid-term election? It would seem as if both parties are fearful although for different reasons. I suppose I'm the only liberal not completely convinced that the democrats have the leadership exo-skeleton to support the living flesh and blood that comes with real majority power. It seems as if over the last twenty years the solon's of the left have let their once whipped and honed leadership tactics boil and disintegrate into the rough equivalent of hearing Teddy Kennedy talk, which is a droning sound followed by the thought "I wonder if I could still spell Chapaquitic ?" Here we are though, like it or not, and although the credit can not surely fall to the rank and file democrats for turning this ride in America it's here. I think anyone can plainly see this majority of support was the President's to lose and he lost it. A sitting President with approval numbers in the doldrums. A party with scandals at almost every level of thier leadership and congressional teams, the liberals have haphazardly walked into what seems to be a situation in which they can "steal," America back,as it where, but the real question is are they prepared? The answer in my mind if a resounding no. When conservatives wrestled away majority from the Democrats all those many years back it was done under a flag of calculation and conformity. It rode a wave of many revolutionary tactics such as mass mailing and contemporary push-pull polling. In stark contrast, this current paradigm shift has been induced not by the potential receiver of power but moreso by inaptitude on the other side of the aisle. Albeit, like many I too feel strongly that a change by any measure is what this country desperately needs, to whom to do we turn to steer this great country now re-dedicated to liberal ideals? Harry Reid? John Kerry? Hillary Clinton? Remember these names and contrast them with thier intrinsic negative polarities. Recall that although this country has deemed it necessary for a change in leadership, the so called conservatives are still here and earning thier names. Social issues are as strident as ever with many of them facing us prominently and robustly as a country. Does the liberal leadership structure have an idealist whom can carry Alabama and South Carolina on his or her back? If the answer is yes, which I'm not convinced it is, what values does this person extol? Why has he/she the right to guide this country? By default? This line of logic has very real and substantial outcomes the most powerful of which leaves an American voting public without a party to turn to, one inept and the other unable.
Well I suppose that's about all for me. Keeping bundling up and bundling down, just keep bundling. I hope that this afternoon holds in store for you what it has in store for me, throwing balls at pins. Which is of course, more political commentary. Until then, get a damn haircut will you?

I've been thinking about getting a little place down by the lake.

Hey y'all,
Another action packed (KATHOOM!) edition of Andrew Rant, how the heck are you? Pretty good over here. Another Friday rolls around and I can already feel the palpable hue that is the weekend barely being able to holds itself back from tidle-waving (sp?) all over the collective beaches of Athens, Ohio. Although I'm not exactly willing to completely assign the weekend such a blatant favoritism over the weekdays I will say that by fan applause alone the weekends win hands down, and I'm usually driven by the huddled masses. Ask my furbie.
All in all though I just can't seem to shake what occupies me on the weekdays, in order that I might fully lose myself in the weekends. I suppose, stepping back, that I really don't know whether to consider thaT bad or good however, I will say that I try to lose myself in every endeavor and since I can't I'm a little bent out of shape. Perhaps it's the endless involvement into the sphere of academia, but God help me, sometimes I wake up with accounting problems in my head. Although I am aware that there are those less fortunate than I, I truly challenge anyone to spend an evening alone with accounting thoughts eating up your brain and then come talk to me. Suddenly Sudan doesn't seem that bad.
Of course that's in poor taste, (After all, from what I understand there's not much to taste over there period), but what I'm driving at is when something breaks the inner-sanctuary that is your private thoughts it can be a little disorienting. Often I find myself digging in my neighbors trash looking for shreds of long forgotten Eggo's and wondering is this really what I want for myself. Then though I inevitably take a bite, PURE TRASH CAN HEAEN. Baby, you haven't lived until you've gotten down sideways to wheeze on some trash marinated waffle. The thrill is more than the human central nervous systems was designed to stand which is perhaps why I usually cough blood for several days afterward.
On to lighter news though, Today a ship nearing Egypts safe harbors sank in the wee hours of the morning, leaving many dead and many more wondering what the cause was. Apparently, whatever it was, it was something that elicits much secrecy in the press, as of now (3:00 pm) I still have no idea as to exactly what the cause was, other than the ship just being plum afraid of Egypt. This may leave many to ponder exactly what kind of haphazard rules to we have in place that such an old boat is deemed seaworthy, it has many people up in arms about the lack of words sensitivity that no one seems to be giving this international story the tragedy title that it deserves. Albeit, I feel/think these things to I can't help but share my overriding sentiment which is, wow ships sink very rarely. I had no idea that people were still transported by sea from place to place which I guess is something that I really should have guessed, but the news that this story is making must mean one thing. There hasn't been a ship sinking in quite some time otherwise I would have heard about it. That's great news. One thing humanity has conquered, significantly less sinking, personally I couldn't be any more proud. It's difficult to tame the sea, it, as many animals, is just as wild as the tempest winds. In fact, some "scientists," seem to think that its wildness may be directly proportional with "weather patterns," "geo-graphic phenomena," "tectonic plate shifts," and "alf," but whatever the reason/s we seem to be coming out on top of the fight.
Foreign media and international relations is something that never ceases to amaze me. Personally, I believe the main reasons why its so engrossing is the complete apathy of the American public to EVERYTHING. It's remarkable. Admittedly, the nature of our social tint has allowed the media to paint almost everything outside these borders as a potential hostile zone, so maybe it's not shocking to Joe Citizen when something gets blown up/torn down/installed/waged war upon/starved/diseased/systematically eradicated/cut off/cut in/bribed/murdered/given a Mellow Yellow, but even still someone should probably at least FEIGN an interest for God's sake. I believe from the President down, the American social conscious that we broadcast must read something like this to other countries "yeah okay, I heard Friends is playing back to back Tuesdays on TBS." To make matters worse no one in Pakistan is really that familiar with Friends! So i suggest two things. One course of action involves realizing that these people that die/live/eat things are HUMAN. The other involves giving the wit of Chandler to the world. Which one is your money on?
Welllllll I guess that's about all for me. When hungover it's difficult to sustain any really thoughts, so I've left you with all these fake ones. Enjoy, they're reheatable.

I'll bring home the turkey if you bring home the bacon.

Do you ever dance with the devil in the pale moonlight?

Hey team,
Sorry its been so long since I've posted. Although seeing as how its my blog I guess I really don't have all that much to be sorry for, but I'm weak willed and I care about you so I'm sorry. Take it or leave it.
The main reason for the delay in-between posts hasn't been for lack of interesting happenings over here and Andrewonia, rather quite the opposite. Lightening,it would seems, has been hitting paydirt lately as far as I'm concerned. So I guess this post is dedicated to lightning's recent increased accuracy. Way to go lightening! Feel free to respond with any of the good things you've done, readers, and perhaps we can start a "shout out" post. Of course lightening will take precedent over whatever crap you've done, but if I were you I wouldn't complain much about lightening. It's a fickle hellcat. (note:lightening is interpreted to mean my luck with women, thus, we are assuming today IS opposite day).
The main reason for my extended absence is that it has been a real tribulation time academically. Leaving me little to no time to post, probably someone with a better grip on thier time skill could have squeezed it in, but since chaos seems to be the cup I usually drink from I would rather not spit the wine back now. It's been good for so long.
Today though,marks some well deserved R and R time for me. Which (Annie get your gun) means MORE POSTS! Which is what the public wants so its what I'll give 'em. I'm a Libra.
The sincere lack of pressure after being in the proverbial "cooker," for the last two weeks has been somewhat odd, a sensation I was not anticipating. I would liken it, at least from where I'm sitting, to carrying something heavy on your back for a long time and then, once its removed, knowing that you COULD be doing so much more, and, somewhere in the annals of you brain, longing for the weight again. Because it was so hard, so excoriating, it gave you purpose. Not unlike Moriarty after he looses Sherlock, after a while the struggle defines you, and without it you can't help but feel a little empty, but I guess that's why God invented the "Wonder Years."
Here I am then, feeling a little lost with my new recreation time, and although I know it to be ridiculously transient I'm glad it's eating dinner at my house tonight even if it is just one night. It's the one night stands with happiness that I love the best. The thrill of finding something and the agony of losing it stand as the ying and yang in the human experience and I believe I love them the same. Some might call that masochistic, but I call it enjoying the popsicle and then after its gone, enjoying the sensation of knowing I ate a popsicle.
I hope all is good with you as I draw to a close,and I truly hope that you enjoy your next meal. Because it might be your last, 'cuz I'm creepin on you muthafuckka. Watch your back.

Be real.